our "dad" routine

well we were always a close knit family, but dads illness has brought us even closer. I think we have finally got a routine down for keeping family with dad...early mornings are my time with dad, if mom hasn't stayed over night (which she's doing more and more) she comes around 11, on Shannon's days off she trys to get up there mid afternoon, and Lizzy comes late evenings. When Jake comes home on weekends he's up there along with Darrick and Liz's husband, Warren and son, Jeremy. With other family members filling in when they can. We have been trying not to double up to much, because to many people in the room seems to confuse dad more.
Now you see we have a routine but all it takes is a call from one another to throw it off and we all scramble to be there for dad ... and each other. I can only speak for myself...I'm getting tired. I haven't talked about being tired to alot of people but I did have a good talk with Darrick about it. the tiredness isn't coming from being with dad it's coming from the guilt I and I'm guessing Liz ( of course she's the sensible one out of all of us girls) feel. If I'm not up with dad I feel like I'm letting him or mom down. When I'm with dad I feel like I'm letting Darrick and the kids down. Of course Darrick told me not to worry about them, but the guilt still stays with you ( if only I could be sensible like Lizzy =-).
Enough of my rambling ( which is SO easy to due on here!!!) Dad had a roller coaster week. good days and bad, sometimes both in one day. He's tired, been asking to go home, having more pain, and been very emotional. Mom has stayed over night many nights this last week. The good thing is the nurses there make sure she eats. She looks tired/worried. There's been days that dad is so clear it's almost scary and then days that... WOW what happened. Saturday night he thought we had gone gambling and then we were staying at a hotel. He was concerned that the bed was to small for him and mom to sleep in.....if all this wasn't so sad it would be humorous.... love you all thank you for all your support and visits. Dad really does enjoy them.